Friday, October 27, 2006

Hello.... :)

I realized that endless cribbing on my personal foibles gets me nowhere. This post is on my effort to overcome one of my several frailties. I often keep complaining about my inability to remember people by their names, especially of those whom I talk to occasionally but pass by vis-a-vis almost everyday. I feel embarrassed whenever security guards at office or a familiar colleague wishes me by my name while I return them with a plain ‘Helloooooo’. I should say that their greeting with a broad smile indeed makes me feel good and is also the reason for the embarrassing feeling that follows. In an instantaneous urge to cover up my forgetfulness, I do drag the “Lo” part of Hello really long and slow with a broad smile. One of my close friends in the recent past even took me as arrogant and proud when I told him that I could not remember the names of his close friends that he introduced to me at a gathering. I always put up with this behaviour of mine as another characteristic of my absent mindedness but lately realized that I rather not. It was not my absentmindedness that always caused it but it was my over self- consciousness while meeting a new person. I realized that I am in fact arrogant for not paying attention to a person when he introduces himself to me. So, I recently made a conscious effort to know all the ones again in my office and made sure that i know them by name. I deliberately tried to introduce myself to people at office with whom i have never talked before. After some consistent effort, I was able to greet every person who passes by me by his name with a very broad smile. It feels great when you wish people by their names especially with a broad smile (“nice to see you today” kinda smile). Whenever a person introduces himself to you, it’s really important that you pay attention. I normally panic when I get introduced to a new person. This state of mind that arises out of excessive self- consciousness is often the reason for me not remembering people by names and not my absent mindedness. The truth that I discovered in this introspection was that I should stop being excessively self- conscious in whatever I do. I should also blindly not accept that I am absent minded. Probably, I am not. Also, If I really pay attention to every thing that I do, I should be able to discover more about myself beyond absent mindedness. I see a long way to go to completely understand my self....

Tuesday, October 10, 2006

Kurrodu














The above picture of a joint family peeling jackfruit kindles fond memories of my village. I was one of the few fortunate ones to have a taste of both rural and urban life. Though I grew up in the city at my pedhanayana’s (elder brother of my dad) place, I frequently visited my mom and dad in the village who had to take care of the lands. We were a semi-joint family. Though the families were physically apart, I always had a feeling of being in a one big family. I always called my pedhamma (pedhanayana’s wife) as mummy as she was the one who raised me, since I was three. I called my pedhanayana as daddy. However, when both of my parents (moms , dads in village and city) get together, I used to call them by their names with a mummy, daddy suffix to avoid confusion. (isn't it funny?)

Well, let me get back to the picture. I spent all my vacation, be it short or long in the village. I had many cousins to play with in the village. We roamed together in the fields. We also used to help women at home ( my mom , other neighbours) in their farm related activities. Few of our group activities were: sorting grams, peppers, tomatoes from the farms; getting rid of seeds and shell from tamarind; cracking open ground nuts… It was always fun doing this and i recollect them when i look at this picture.

My village was just 40 miles away from the city. I and my cousins all grew up together in the city. I was raised along with my brother, my dad’s younger brother’s son and pedhanayana’s daughters in the city. I was the youngest one in the whole family. I was affectionately called “Kurrodu”, (which means the little one) by my grandmom (pedhamma’s mother). I was always raised with lot of attention partly due to my poor health. I should say that all of us were taken great care by my pedhamma. She bore the burden of raising 3 guys and 2 big girls in the city. While her daughters were in college, she was teaching me how to write. She had great energy and used to toil the whole day in taking great care of us.
Well, my mom in the village spent most of her day in the kitchen. Apart from making food for the members in the family, she also had to prepare lunch for those working in the fields, .. . She however had maids to help her in cooking and maintaining the house..In this way, these two mothers of mine complimented each other to make our joint family a successful one. I owe a lot to them.

I also owe big time to my brothers and sisters. An advantage of being the youngest one in a big family is that you always have some one to show you the way. I realize that most of the important decisions that I have made are influenced by those that my elder brothers and sisters had made for themselves. In this way, you always have a chance to avoid their mistakes. "There is a great advantage of being the Kurrodu of a big family."

Photograph of Joint family - Courtesy: From Kamat's potpurri at www.kamat.com

Wednesday, October 04, 2006

Revealing my True Self



Well, I was tagged by Archana Bahuguna. She is a very good friend of mine. A short conversation with Archana or Inder (Arc’s mister) is enough to set one in a positive frame of mind. I admire them a lot.

She wanted me to list 9 things that would describe myself and they are…

1) I am compassionate. I am very sensitive to the feelings of others. I like talking and comforting people especially when their going gets tough.

2) I am very absent minded. The most shocking one happened during my recent trip to Boston. At the end of a long and useful technical converstation with a girl, She asked my mobile number. I was preoccupied with something else and started giving her my cousin’s number. She wanted to give me a missed call so that I could store her number. It was my cousin who picked up her call that left her speechless and me embarrassed.

3) I like truth and hate hypocrisy.

4) I love listening to carnatic music. I worship M. S. Subbulakshmi. I also like listening to renditions of Sudha raghunathan and Bombay jayashree. I was not formally trained in music but managed to learn few kirtis after listening to them for long. I was never encouraged to pursue music when I was young. I feel deprived of something big.

5) I adore art and interior decoration.

6) I enjoy watching insects, ants, birds. I wish I could talk to them.

7) I enjoy reading spiritual books and self help books. The most recent one being Sivananda’s commentaries on vedanta.

8) I am always curious to learn more on ancient civilizations, their cultures, their origins …

9) I love my job.

I tag the visitors of this blog to share 9 things about themselves....



Tag Picture - Courtesy:www.unicycling.org