Revelation

Underdogs

2009-03-18T12:31:00.000-07:00

Just couldn't resist bragging about this ...

These days, I have been spending most of my evenings mentoring high school students for a Robotics Challenge. It was fun working with a bunch of creative minds. It also helped me get through the misery of missing my 'mom and dad' who returned to India after their wonderful 6 month stay... Will soon blog about our spectacular tour to all the corners of the country...

Coming back to this blog, the regional robotics challenge was held in Atlanta last weekend. We were one amongst 47 teams participating from nearly 9 states. Our two year old team was dwarfed by the presence of several other veteran teams who had been participating for years with sophisticated robots made with sponsorships from NASA, Intel and other biggies.....Now,that didn't stop us from successfully pulling a big upset in the year's challenge. Yes... we emerged as champions by beating all the favorite ones.

The match that spread over two days made the kids go through several stressful circumstances. It challenged their decision making skills. Above all, It helped them showcase gracious professionalism towards others. It is all about maintaining a positive competitive spirit throughout the game towards your peers.
I should say that they had consciously inculcated this spirit during the entire exercise of Robot building.

Initially, Our team emerged to the top spot during the qualifying matches surprising everyone. Things were rosy and several folks gathered around the team with requests to pick them as our alliance partners for quarter finals. As always,the good times did not last long.. The very next day, We started slipping down due to technical failures in the robot in the last few qualifying matches. The teams that wanted themselves as our partners failed to pick us when they moved ahead of us in the rankings. The topmost two seeds ganged up and forged a formidable alliance. We as the eighth seed were not picked by any of the higher seeded teams as partners, who the previous day had made requests to pick them as our partners..... our team had to deal with this tough reality...We being the bottom most seed in the top 8 got the last chance to pick our partners. By then, all the best teams were already cherry-picked by the higher ranking ones. Nevertheless, our team captain judiciously picked two overlooked teams from the remaining lot as partners who despite being ranked far below us were performing strong during the qualifiers. At this point of the game, We were the least expected to win.

During quarter finals, Our alliance had to fight the undefeated first seeded alliance. Out of the blue, we defeated the invincible 'top seeded alliance' adding total thrill to the game. The fight then stretched to four games(win, tie, loss, win) finally resulting in an underdog win. This was the best part of the entire robotics competition.... Then there was no stopping, we began winning all the following matches moved to semis,finals and bagged the regional championship. It was a feel good moment for everyone of us. There were low moments in the game when these kids could have easily given up.... but things went worse only to get them all united and fight back . They showcased great inner strength and positive attitude throughout the game. It was a well deserved win.

I felt really proud to be their mentor..........
I told myself..."miracles do happen, often quite late in the game and they do so for a reason..."

Our team website: Flying Platypi
First Robotics Challenge: www.usfirst.org

The final international level contest is scheduled on Apr16-18 in Atlanta.... Hope we repeat this magic again...

On Top of the World!!!!

2008-08-17T20:29:00.000-07:00

Enjoying every moment with Dad and Mom right now....
Will Soon blog about it!

March for BABIES...

2008-04-24T15:22:00.000-07:00

Pals,

I am participating in a fund raising walk on April , the 26th to gather financial support for research on Prevention of Premature birth and Birth defects. If you are interested in donating to this cause, You can do it at my personal page.
http://www.marchforbabies.org/amdeepakkumar

In Their Shoes

2008-04-02T22:50:00.000-07:00

When I woke up this morning, I expected the day to be no different from every other day of my existence. I wake up, eat, go to work, come back home, watch TV and then go back to sleep. It's mundane ...after all, Isn't it?

Well, Not Really!! Little did I realise that there were tons of things that were going perfectly right everyday in my life that I failed to appreciate the profundity of being alive and wholesome in mind and body.

Today turned out to be one of those days when my heart was filled with gratitude and appreciation for the gifts that I have been endowed with. I had the opportunity to delve into the minds of some of the bravest ones who put a bold fight every moment struggling to break open the hard walls that harshly confine them both mentally and physically. I happened to watch this documentary in HBO on the lives of Autistic kids and their family. It documented several months of their hard work to perform in a musical. The enormous emotional stress undergone by the parents to understand their kids condition was evident.Every moment of the documentary was heart wrenching. The kids had to put a great deal of effort to gain control of their movements and senses. Their mind and body repeatedly failed to cooperate and every simple task was uphill,arduous, painstaking... Yet,They don't give up.

The best part was their performance before a crowd. I was infact sitting at the edge of my couch while watching this part on TV. One of my anxious moments was when a kid played "Twinkle Twinkle little star" in his violin.. He was so proud and happy after playing it. The pride with which he glances his mom at the end of it is a priceless watch.

It felt great to see all of them performing with confidence. At the end of it, I involuntarily clapped my hands and shared their pride and joy. The gargantuan applause from the crowd cheered the kids and their family...And for me, The whole experience was exhilarating. It was a revelation. It would be one of those special moments that I would fondly recall in future...

Check their Website: Autism: The musical

End Note:
If you haven't noticed, I changed the BGM of my blog to suit this post. It is one of Philip Glass' minimalistic pieces which was popularised in the movie "The Hours". I find it simple,intriguing, resonating with the nethermost part of a complex human mind much similiar to Raja's theme in Mouna Ragam...

Tis the season to be jolly, fa la la la..

2008-01-05T10:36:00.000-08:00

It was 1:30 A.M when I finally finished packing and wrapping the gifts purchased for my sister, BIL, pedhamma and pedhanayana for christmas.
"Better head to bed or risk missing your flight in the morning", I said to myself.
I was sure that I would not find time to do a thing once I arrive at my sister's place. I usually get swarmed by my little nephews and hardly find any time to spend with others in the family. I disappointedly went to bed cursing my poor planning and time management. I felt bad for having not made a christmas card for my nephews who had been eagerly awaiting my arrival for weeks.

5:50 A.M, At the ticketing desk of Delta Airlines

Me: Hi!
(showing my e-ticket to the ticketer).
Ticketer: Sir, You are late,You have missed the flight.
Me: What? Are u sure? Isn't it supposed to depart at 6:45 A.M ( I showed her my e-ticket)
Ticketer: Well, The ticket that you purchased from Orbitz has the time printed in it wrong. Sorry about that. I can put you in the next flight to New York city without any additional charge.
Me: Thanks a lot! When is it?
Ticketer: At 12 noon.
Me: Are you serious? :(

Well, I was disappointed as I would be missing my favourite poori-aloo prepared by my pedhamma for breakfast. In lieu of it, I would be served with a rebuke from my Akka(sister) for having not checked the time of departure in the website. On the other hand, I was happy that I had 6 more hours to make a wonderful christmas card for my nephews.

I wanted to make a picture collage in the card. So, I went back home to pick my favourite snaps of kids & family, then headed to CVS store to develop them and then to St Michaels to pick art accesories. I spent nearly three hours shopping around, thinking about a theme and finally had enough time only to cut the developed snapshots. I packed the cut pieces and art accesories in my backpack and boarded the flight at noon.

I made full use of the flying time in making the card. I glued pictures and added few lines advising my nephews to share their toys, to work together and not to quarrel in the coming year. I finally finished and signed it as SANTA. The person who sat next to me gave a broad smile after looking at all that I have been doing.

Well, I realised that I was in a very happy mood. I was excited about Christmas and the new year. I also found everyone around me in a jubiliant mood. I thought that it was the advent of christmas that made everyone of us merry.

I still had around twenty minutes to reach new york city. I closed the christmas card and happily placed it in my backpack. I then asked myself, "When was the last time when I found myself and people around me as excited and happy as they are today?"

It quickly brought back wonderful memories of pongal that I used to celebrate in my village. I would wake up on this day to see my mom and Ravana athai cooking pongal in the yard. I just loved watching the boiling pongal. I would run towards the yard only to be rebuked by athai who would then ask me to take a bath before coming to the fire place. I would be given an oiled head bath. Neatly dressed, I would go and sit next to the fire stove made of red bricks.
On this day, Pongal was made outside the kitchen in the yard, in an earthen pot smeared with manjal (turmeric powder), adorned with white and kumkuma thirunamams. The stove in the yard was made with red bricks and was fuelled by split fire wood. The bricks would also be smeared with manjal and bore namams and kumkumam pottus.
The other visual treat on these days was the sight of the huge kolam that Jayanthi akka would draw in the front of our house. She would start the piece of art with the preparation of canvas. The loose ground soil would be stiffened by spraying a mix of water and cowdung. When dried, it provided a dark brownish-green canvas for the kolam. She would then draw kolam with rice powder or powdered white marble. After completing the kolam, she would border them with a thick red paste made using brick powder.

The next attraction is the cowshed. Cows would have been cleaned by Arumugam anna or Periyavar thatha. They would be fully ready for the procession on the next day (on Maattu pongal). The cows would be decorated on the next day with balloons tied to their horns. Arumagam anna would also have their horns painted.

The whole ambience would be filled with a unique blend of fragrant agarbathis and smoke emanating from the fireplace. A loud discordant song (usually of L.R Easwari or Sizhkazhi Govindarajan) from the nearby temple would serve as the background music.

During these days everybody in the village would be in a very good mood. The entire village would be bright and the streets were adorned with colourful kolams. One would also see dried chewed pieces of sugarcane lying around at the side of the red streets.

This sweet remiscence came to an abrupt end when my plane landed in NEW YORK city. I was filled with excitement and got ready to be received by my sister. Eventhough the reminiscence was short-lived, it set a cheerful mood that prevailed during the entire trip.

During the entire Christmas vacation, I had been consumed with a joyous feeling. I also found people around me in a similiar mood. The jubiliant mood prevailing in New York city during christmas eve reminded me of the mood that prevailed in my village during pongal.

I felt sad that my nephews would never be able to experience the same kind of joy that I had experienced in my village during pongal. The occasion that they associated with activity and cheer was christmas. My sister and I did our best in our own ways to make it memorable for them.

I am sure that they would joyfully recall as to how their mom erected a christmas tree, decorated it with pine cones, stars, wreaths, dolls..quite similiar to how I recall my mom decorating the house with thoranams of mango leaves and garlands of yellow chamandhis. Just as how the new clothes brought joy to us during pongal, the gifts provided similiar joy and excitement to my nephews. I am sure that they would also associate christmas occasion with the visit of their maama and joyfully recall how he delivered "christmas cards and gifts" from Santa.

Christmas Tree in our house
..... other trees in the city here

Photos by Kurrodu

Happiness

2007-11-04T17:24:00.000-08:00

A Moment of Revelation

2007-10-05T20:49:00.000-07:00

I got out of work early today. It was supposed to be a very eventful day at work as my colleagues planned a short picnic in a neighbourhood park for the afternoon. Several games and fund raising events were planned for this day, weeks in advance. Unfortunately, I chose to stay away from it. Thanks to my palette expander ( prior stage to braces), which I had them placed in my mouth, a couple of days ago. As a result of which I can hardly bite or chew food. The worst part was that I could not roll my tongue with ease. It crippled my speech and totally distorted my pronunciation of words. Inorder to avoid embarassing myself at the gathering, I chose to stay away from the crowd. I spent the whole afternoon alone at the office, complaining and fretting over my condition.

After a long day at work (my condition made it seem even longer), I had to make a trip to walmart to buy some stuff for cooking. As I entered walmart, I saw this guy (seemed to be in his early 40's) well dressed and walking aimlessly towards me at the entrance. He seemed to have less control over his body movements and not normal. Momentarily, another old guy leaped forward from behind, pulled his hand and led him towards another direction.

The old guy asked me and others nearby to excuse his son and then moved ahead. I was moved by this scene. I was all the more impressed by the confidence of this old guy. He was lean and weak. He bore a broad smile in his face and looked very confident. I felt sad that he had to take care of his son in his old age. His confidence trivialised my complaining during the day. It was indeed a moment of revelation.

Sringaram

2007-09-18T08:00:00.000-07:00

Have you seen or even heard of this movie - 'Sringaram'. Well, this movie bagged three national awards for the year 2005.
Best Music - Padmabushan Lalgudi Jayaraman.
Best Choreography - Saroj Khan.
Best Cinematography - Madhu Ambat.
.... and yet a few are aware of it.

I was told that this film was launched in Los Angeles International Film festival last year in April and had been receiving rave reviews since then. It had won more than ten international awards. The work was deemed outstanding. I recently heard the songs by Padma bushan Shri Lalgudi Jayaraman who has done an extraordinary work. He has used only classical instruments and the music is rich and powerful. The sad part remains that the distributors in India (chennai) were not ready to buy this movie inspite of the splendid work and its international recognition. I attribute this to the poor taste of movie audience in India. Its release (in India) has been delayed for around two years. It failed to attract buyers even after the announcement of national awards early this year.

The recent felicitation of the awardees(although much delayed) has brought the movie to the limelight. One of the production houses in chennai has finally agreed to buy it and is releasing it on September 21.

Folks in India, particularly in chennai should consider watching this movie and encourage the efforts of its team.

We have so long been encouraging movies; with cliched story lines that totally lack creativity; those that are filled with stereotypical characters and larger than life super heroes; with frequent portrayal of women as vamps and glam dolls. Why not give a chance to movies like sringaram that are excellent in terms of quality and honest in their potrayal? Also feminists out there must consider watching this movie. The movie is supposed to be one of the most sincere potrayals of women in India and glorifies womanhood in general.

I hope it releases its DVDS soon.

Happiness

2007-08-21T07:45:00.000-07:00

"Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family."

To Hug A Tree

2007-06-29T13:59:00.000-07:00

Everyone enjoys travelling and so do I. I prefer travelling alone. It gives ample space for myself and makes me more sensitive to things around me. When you are travelling alone, you are more approachable for a conversation by a fellow traveler and you tend to entertain it unless you have a really interesting book to read or atleast until you put your head phones on. Occasionally, the conversation might turn interesting and would go on until either of those involved gets tired of chatting. Some of the most interesting conversations that i could recall have been with fellow passengers on trips. The topics that float in these conversations are usually varied from the mundane 'erratic weather' or 'War of Terror!' to really delicious ones like "The Jamaican way of cooking salted dry fish (KARUVAADU in tamil)"
(If not from the Jamaican woman, I would have continued to think that 'salted dry fish' is a south indian delicacy. She said, "Jamaicans love it with egg plant.")

The most memorable conversation of recent times was the one during my trip to salt lake city. The conversation sensitised me to one of the most interesting aspects of Hindu deities that I was not really conscious of until then.

It was a two and half hour trip to Denver from Raleigh. I introduced myself to my co-passenger on board. He then introduced himself as Mr. $$ski. He was a second generation polish immigrant. He appeared to be in his late 50's. He was a geologist by profession and has been extremely successful in his career. He was returning home from a conference in Raleigh. His recent interests have however been in Photography, Direction and Editing videos. He claimed himself to be a part of a fraternity that protects old trees from felling. He is also pursuing a degree in Art and has been actively involved in a research on the goddesses of the world. He had some prior knowledge about Hindu deities.

After a brief talk on the purpose of our trips and our professions, He asked me if I was an Indian and Hindu. He then asked me to explain as to why Hindus have so many deities and asked my views on polytheism practised by a hindu. This was one of the most difficult questions that I had ever been asked. After a long awkward pause, I answered him that I was still in the process of understanding my religion and
my interpretation of Hindu faith may not be the most accurate one. I then continued upon his request saying, "Inspite of the fact that Hindus worship many gods and goddesses, our faith is actually monotheistic". He was confused and asked me as to how do I claim that Hinduism is monotheism. I replied, "The core concept of Hindusim is Advaitha (not-two) which means that there is a single universal consciousness that encompassess everything that we see and feel. One attains salvation when he completely identifies his individual self (Jeevatma) with the Supremeself (Paramatma). The process of attaining salvation is the goal of a Hindu. Infact, the essence of all holy scriptures, upanishads is conveyed in brief maxims (a.k.a. Maha wakyas) such as "Aham Brahmasmi" which means I am Brahman. "

He was still not convinced by my reply and wondered as to why we worship many gods when the essence of all the scriptures states that Everyone is God. I then elaborated that these deities are just tokens or symbols, each of which personifies certain aspect of the supreme self. Moreover, it is very difficult for a kid or folks in their initial stages of spirituality to completely understand concepts like "You are god" or "Thou art that" as they are very abstract. These stataments might or will nurture arrogance in their young minds, curbing their discipline and convey wrong messages.

The symbols or idols help the young ones to physically realise the presence of a higher power. Festicals and rituals in temples sensitise the people of the presence of higher consciousness. The religion Hinduism actually begins with the worship of idols and does not end with rituals and festivals. One having attained the stage of realisation of a supreme self is expected to raise above these mere tokens. He is expected to work hard and understand his true self, constantly train his mind over the course of his entire life. Thus becoming a Hindu is a life long unceasing process. This is precisely the goals of Hinduism according to my current level of understanding. Please do not get carried away by idol worship or worship of multiple deities as it is mere symbolism"

I don't really remember what else I said to him, but this is precisely the meassage that I conveyed him. He seemed to have been slightly convinced and he then took out a book of potraits of goddesses of various cultures from his bag. It had the pictures of Lakshmi and Kamakshi along with other Greek, Egyptian and Roman goddesses. He quickly pointed out that each of these indian deities hold a herb or a flower in their hands. He asked me if Hindus are very conscious of preserving trees and plants as most of their deities are depicted holding plants and flowers. I was a bit startled as I never felt that way whenever I see these deities.

I have been going around temples and circum ambulating holy shrines for the past two decades. It never occurred to me that these deities might symbolically indicate the importance of trees and plants. I hesistantly told him " We Hindus do worship Neem, Peepal trees but I am not sure if Hinduism has been successful in creating a sense of preserving trees in India. I am sure that there are many Hindus who would prefer to cut down trees if there is some monetary benefit attached to it.However, India has been the home of several movements that advocate the imporance of trees like Chipko movement led by Mr. Sunderlal Bahuguna. I don't think religion had any role to play in these movements."

(A anectode related to my reference of chipko movement:
I was happy that I recalled this movement during the conversation which most of the indians are unaware of. I participated in an oratorical contest when I was in eight standard. The topic was wildlife conservation and was held on world environment day. I and my friend Sriram participated in it and we had practised the speech together for over a month. He used to say his version to me and I would recite my version to him. He had used quotes by Sunderlal Bahuguna in his speech and I always wanted to include them in mine but didn't for obvious reasons. Anyway, He finally won the contest and I had lost it. Though I regreted then for not winning the contest, I am happy that the experience has helped me to recall the name of the movement and its founder until this day. Thanks to Sriram too. Talking about chipko movement to MR. $$ski made me feel great. )

I then continued " Few Hindu Deities are associated with diseases and their cure. The herbs that these deities hold might cure the diseases associated with them (Eg. Amman with neem). Crops like paddy and sugarcane are a source of food and income to
the farmers and so the deity in the picture (Kamakshi) is shown holding them. May be, the depiction of these deities holding herbs in general
indicate the importance of plants and trees but until now I never saw it that way. The sight of any deity just instills devotion and reminds me the presence of the greater self"

This conversation went on and on. We then discussed about worship of animals, nature, rivers, sun, Moon and even discussed phallic symbol (Lingam) at great length. We then discussed the sculptures in india that were potrayed in the book.
We discussed the differences that came about in sculpting goddesses during the moghuls when compared to the ones made in early first century.

It was a really wonderful experience. It gave me an opportunity to propagate my faith and added a new dimension to my worship of deities. Nowadays, the sight of these portraits invokes a sense of environmental awareness in my mind. This was the revelation at the end of my discussion with this stranger.

I also learn't a new word from him that rings in my mind since then - "TREE HUGGER". He called himself a tree hugger. After returning home, as I typed in TREE HUGGER in wikipedia, I was surprised and proud to see its place of origin.

Seasons of Life

2007-03-24T21:11:00.000-07:00

I recently visited an old friend of mine in Boston. He stood by me
during toughest of times. The sight of him brought great joy to me.
His abode was colourful and vibrant with great energy that could
crush every sad feeling in heart.

At the end of first day of my work-related trip, I rushed from my hotel to catch my friend and his abode in pixels. I wanted to visit him before it turns dark and cold. However, it was already half past six in the evening when i got to the T station. After switching a couple of T trains, I finally alighted at the stop close to his place. As I walked out of the station, I started to catch a glimpse of him and his friends. It was then I realised that it was winter and the sight of my friend's home was at once agonizing. When i finally approached him, the sight of him evoked feelings of grief and pain in me. Ironically, during this meeting I found our roles switched. He was gloomy and listness while I wore his usual self.

The story of our friendship goes this way..

I got my first internship which was also my first real job in life at Boston. I was then from a smaller city and the bright, bustling life at Boston was totally alien to me. I was happy that i was interning in a reputed research lab and was eager to work under a popular personality who was widely recognised as one of the promising innovators. This happy feeling of mine was however shortliving. The environment in my workplace was totally unfriendly with numerous restrictions that crippled my creativity. our head was literally a boss from hell. I could say that my experience was similiar to that of Anne Hathway in "The Devil wears prada". The long work hours, moody colleagues and discrimination made my life miserable. My work was indeed making me sick. My economic condition then gave me no other choice but endure it..

I yearned for a friend whom i could share my grief with. It was then during one of my routine rides in T , I met this guy who was very friendly. He talked to me as though he knew me for years. He also happened to be from my hometown. The talk eased me out and I quickly befriended this stranger, who also happened to stay
close to my residence. It did not take much time to realise the true intentions of this stranger. He was one of those home marketing guys who wanted my
help to sell his products. Adding to my grief, he was trying to convince me that my current job was trivial and pestered me to join his group of so called 'independent business owners. Annoyed by his "fast money making tales" , I really had a tough time in getting myself away from this nuisance.

My job and this guy really made my life a living hell. It was during one of these days on my way back from ISKCON temple, I stopped by the beautiful Boston Public Gardens located in the heart of the city. It was full of life with swans and geese moving around. As i walked through the gardens, I was embraced by this beautiful tree. He stood by the side of a pond. His branches were so long and ran low that some of them touched the water below. He reminded me of the grand old Banyan tree of my village. Sitting under the tree brought fond memories of my village. He had a green carpet knitted out of grass that invited visitors to sit aside him. I spent hours sitting there in his shade, watching the swans swim, walk , eat and the squirrels fight. The sounds of nature comforted me and relieved me off the stress. I enjoyed every moment on that day. I then started visiting him every weekend that followed and thus developed a strong friendship between us.

but today.., when I come to thank him, I find his state saddening..

He can neither talk nor hear, yet he still conveys a message to me. His silence shouts aloud and carries a message for those who listen to him. He can't walk but his sturdy posture reminds me to stand up and face adversities as he faces the seasons of his life.

"I am so proud of you my friend. I shall visit you again... but now, I part you saying..Your winter is sure to end.....Spring is not far behind" .

Discovering the value of..

2006-11-18T19:42:00.000-08:00

After a hectic long day, I was relaxing on my couch relishing a cup of hot elaichi tea. The strong smell of the tea brought fond memories of Tiruvannamalai Girivalam (circumambulation of the holy arunachala hill on a full moon day). The 9 mile pathway was replete with tea stalls selling different flavors of herbal masala tea that was a treat to one's olfactories. My reminiscence of Tiruvannamalai was however short lived as I soon chose to switch on my TV only to incessantly flip through the channels without purpose. It was then a colorful dish in food network that immediately grabbed my attention and brought my involuntary act of flipping to a halt. Well, it did not last long though.. as the program just finished followed by a fitness ad…. Just as I was about to switch over to the next channel, a short ad that followed …SHOOK ME UP.

After watching it, a series of incidents which arose feelings that I have been usually ignoring quickly flashed upon me...

Incident 1: A while ago, I cursed my dishwasher for not getting rid off the greasy stains and spicy smell from those pans. While Complaining abt this, I was washing the pan with the tap fully open (tap fully open!!!which I can never afford to do if I had been living in Chennai) and ignored a strong feeling that was shouting loud in me - “Do you need so much water to rinse a tiny pan? close that tap now…”

Incident 2: Yesterday, few minutes past 8 in the morning. I had to attend an early morning discussion scheduled at 8:30 and so wanted to leave home soon. I was so impatient that I wasted almost half of my bowl of cereal in the sink ignoring the voice in me that said “You are so lame to waste that food, can’t you spend a couple of minutes on your breakfast?”

Incident 3: Few days back, after ordering a seemingly attractive dish at the Thai restaurant, I was disappointed to find it bland in spite of my request to make it spicy. I wasted it and was least motivated to get a box and take the food home. I was strongly ignoring the feeling that said “You are wasting food idiot! Don’t you realize that?”

All the above not so important incidents, which seemed trivial to me till then gained importance after watching this ad. It was an ad by a Mass. Gen hospital doctor who was requesting for more food grains, potable water and medicines for the refugee camps in Darfur. She was one of the International Medical corps who were fighting the darfur crisis. She was explaining the extreme scarcity of water, food grains and medicines at the camp. With world nations failing to contribute at least half the aid requested by the United Nations, the doctors were having difficult time fighting starvation. The scene turned more terrible when she showed us an African mother sitting in a tent, a feet away with her almost-dying 2 year old kid. Having lost hope on the small one, she was fighting to keep her other two children alive by feeding them with water and stale food. Worse part is that these elderly ones can’t go out of the camp for water or food as there were merciless rebels waiting for a chance to spray bullets on these poor stick figures. Though safe in the camp, they are indeed trapped to death due to lack of food, water and medicines.

After watching this ad, my immediate action was to spend few hours learning more about the sudan support program in the unicef website, investigating about it and then finally donated a humble sum that I can afford for the UN emergency program. However, this act of donation was not enough to quench my grief. I realised that I failed to appreciate the value of abundant resources that I have access to. This ad made me appreciate their value than ever before, be it my food, environment,water, time or any other resource. In fact, it is this feeling in me that would benefit my community more than a single act of donation.

Now that i have written this post, I would no longer agree with someone who says “I just can't survive without my cell phone”….Oops, I better remember this post, whenever I wash my dishes…

Hello.... :)

2006-10-27T10:09:00.000-07:00

I realized that endless cribbing on my personal foibles gets me nowhere. This post is on my effort to overcome one of my several frailties. I often keep complaining about my inability to remember people by their names, especially of those whom I talk to occasionally but pass by vis-a-vis almost everyday. I feel embarrassed whenever security guards at office or a familiar colleague wishes me by my name while I return them with a plain ‘Helloooooo’. I should say that their greeting with a broad smile indeed makes me feel good and is also the reason for the embarrassing feeling that follows. In an instantaneous urge to cover up my forgetfulness, I do drag the “Lo” part of Hello really long and slow with a broad smile. One of my close friends in the recent past even took me as arrogant and proud when I told him that I could not remember the names of his close friends that he introduced to me at a gathering. I always put up with this behaviour of mine as another characteristic of my absent mindedness but lately realized that I rather not. It was not my absentmindedness that always caused it but it was my over self- consciousness while meeting a new person. I realized that I am in fact arrogant for not paying attention to a person when he introduces himself to me. So, I recently made a conscious effort to know all the ones again in my office and made sure that i know them by name. I deliberately tried to introduce myself to people at office with whom i have never talked before. After some consistent effort, I was able to greet every person who passes by me by his name with a very broad smile. It feels great when you wish people by their names especially with a broad smile (“nice to see you today” kinda smile). Whenever a person introduces himself to you, it’s really important that you pay attention. I normally panic when I get introduced to a new person. This state of mind that arises out of excessive self- consciousness is often the reason for me not remembering people by names and not my absent mindedness. The truth that I discovered in this introspection was that I should stop being excessively self- conscious in whatever I do. I should also blindly not accept that I am absent minded. Probably, I am not. Also, If I really pay attention to every thing that I do, I should be able to discover more about myself beyond absent mindedness. I see a long way to go to completely understand my self....

Kurrodu

2006-10-10T21:07:00.000-07:00

The above picture of a joint family peeling jackfruit kindles fond memories of my village. I was one of the few fortunate ones to have a taste of both rural and urban life. Though I grew up in the city at my pedhanayana’s (elder brother of my dad) place, I frequently visited my mom and dad in the village who had to take care of the lands. We were a semi-joint family. Though the families were physically apart, I always had a feeling of being in a one big family. I always called my pedhamma (pedhanayana’s wife) as mummy as she was the one who raised me, since I was three. I called my pedhanayana as daddy. However, when both of my parents (moms , dads in village and city) get together, I used to call them by their names with a mummy, daddy suffix to avoid confusion. (isn't it funny?)

Well, let me get back to the picture. I spent all my vacation, be it short or long in the village. I had many cousins to play with in the village. We roamed together in the fields. We also used to help women at home ( my mom , other neighbours) in their farm related activities. Few of our group activities were: sorting grams, peppers, tomatoes from the farms; getting rid of seeds and shell from tamarind; cracking open ground nuts… It was always fun doing this and i recollect them when i look at this picture.

My village was just 40 miles away from the city. I and my cousins all grew up together in the city. I was raised along with my brother, my dad’s younger brother’s son and pedhanayana’s daughters in the city. I was the youngest one in the whole family. I was affectionately called “Kurrodu”, (which means the little one) by my grandmom (pedhamma’s mother). I was always raised with lot of attention partly due to my poor health. I should say that all of us were taken great care by my pedhamma. She bore the burden of raising 3 guys and 2 big girls in the city. While her daughters were in college, she was teaching me how to write. She had great energy and used to toil the whole day in taking great care of us.
Well, my mom in the village spent most of her day in the kitchen. Apart from making food for the members in the family, she also had to prepare lunch for those working in the fields, .. . She however had maids to help her in cooking and maintaining the house..In this way, these two mothers of mine complimented each other to make our joint family a successful one. I owe a lot to them.

I also owe big time to my brothers and sisters. An advantage of being the youngest one in a big family is that you always have some one to show you the way. I realize that most of the important decisions that I have made are influenced by those that my elder brothers and sisters had made for themselves. In this way, you always have a chance to avoid their mistakes. "There is a great advantage of being the Kurrodu of a big family."

Photograph of Joint family - Courtesy: From Kamat's potpurri at www.kamat.com

Revealing my True Self

2006-10-04T15:02:00.000-07:00

Well, I was tagged by Archana Bahuguna. She is a very good friend of mine. A short conversation with Archana or Inder (Arc’s mister) is enough to set one in a positive frame of mind. I admire them a lot.

She wanted me to list 9 things that would describe myself and they are…

1) I am compassionate. I am very sensitive to the feelings of others. I like talking and comforting people especially when their going gets tough.

2) I am very absent minded. The most shocking one happened during my recent trip to Boston. At the end of a long and useful technical converstation with a girl, She asked my mobile number. I was preoccupied with something else and started giving her my cousin’s number. She wanted to give me a missed call so that I could store her number. It was my cousin who picked up her call that left her speechless and me embarrassed.

3) I like truth and hate hypocrisy.

4) I love listening to carnatic music. I worship M. S. Subbulakshmi. I also like listening to renditions of Sudha raghunathan and Bombay jayashree. I was not formally trained in music but managed to learn few kirtis after listening to them for long. I was never encouraged to pursue music when I was young. I feel deprived of something big.

5) I adore art and interior decoration.

6) I enjoy watching insects, ants, birds. I wish I could talk to them.

7) I enjoy reading spiritual books and self help books. The most recent one being Sivananda’s commentaries on vedanta.

8) I am always curious to learn more on ancient civilizations, their cultures, their origins …

9) I love my job.

I tag the visitors of this blog to share 9 things about themselves....

Tag Picture - Courtesy:www.unicycling.org

A facet of truth

2006-09-05T21:00:00.000-07:00

Hi folks,
Thanks for stopping by my blog.
Every experience in life is an opportunity to discover our true selves. Even though each of us seem unique and our experiences appear disjoint, distinct.. yet they are all nothing but 'flashes' on various facets of the unchanging truth. The truth is that We all share the same core personality and are all dependent on each other. So, each of our experiences is sure to benefit the other and is the only way to discover our true nature.
In the words of John Donne,
"No man is an island, entire of itselfevery man is a piece of the continent, a part of the mainif a clod be washed away by the sea, Europe is the less, as well as if a promontory were, as well as if a manor of thy friends or of thine own wereany man's death diminishes me, because I am involved in mankindand therefore never send to know for whom the bell tolls it tolls for thee."
Let us share,analyse and study our every encounter with the facet of truth in ourselves and thus discover the peace within.
Photograph of Mother Teresa - Courtesy :aura.zaadz.com